A Year in Film: 1979

Let me set the scene for you. It is nineteen seventy-nine. You have just exited a theater, possibly sporting a mullet. What did you just watch? It will deeply affect the rest of your life, whether that is through having a crippling fear of hallways, never looking at Marlon Brando the same way again (or, for that matter, water buffalo), or subconsciously comparing every puppet you see to the green frog that has just stolen your heart.

But maybe none of those scenarios are true. Maybe you just stepped out of Kramer vs. Kramer, the Marriage Story of 40 years before Marriage Story. Humans tell themselves the same stories over and over again, from different perspectives, sometimes with Dustin Hoffman, sometimes with Adam Driver. And this tale of two people whose lives are falling apart was actually the highest grossing film (in the US) of the year, beating out storied franchises and anticipated sequels like James Bond and Rocky. Why? It’s probably because Kramer vs. Kramer is really really good, and the entries from those now-storied franchises in this year were fairly mid-tier.

First, Rocky II, which takes the ‘immediate sequel’ idea and runs with it, picking up literal minutes after the first Rocky ended. It also dares to ask ‘what if we took what made the ending to the first Rocky really good and kneecapped it?’ Rocky ends with a loss. Sorry to spoil the movie, but it’s like fifty years old at this point, and you, if you’ve even heard of Rocky, which is highly unlikely, because it’s fifty years old, should know at least the vague details of it. It’s one of the only movies that has ever made my grandfather cry. Anyway, the ending is famously like a realistic storybook. Rocky doesn’t win, but he does go the distance, and Apollo Creed, his opponent, ends up respecting him at the end, promising that he won’t demand a rematch. Guess what happens in Rocky II. He asks for a rematch. Hooray consistency! And then Rocky wins the rematch! Wow, incredible. Way to go Rocky II, you’ve successfully undermined yourself!

Second, Moonraker. Take James Bond, what would you say is the most unlikely thing he could do? Raise a family? Maybe. Have a pet dog? Sure. Go to space? He’s actually done it. And the movie he does it in is Moonraker! It’s honestly not bad, and it was the highest grossing movie of the year worldwide. There’s a lot of Star Wars influence within it, as well as the only returning henchman between movies, Richard Kiel’s Jaws, who comes down a dark alleyway dressed as a clown in the scariest shot in film history not exaggerating look up “clown.m4v” on YouTube. Another thing that stands out about the movie is an interestingly harrowing sequence where a woman is chased into the forest by dogs. It’s shot like a Stephen King movie. The rest of the movie is patently ridiculous. As per usual with Roger Moore as Bond. But why cancel the already announced upcoming Bond movie and release this one? Why make Bond float around in zero-gravity?

The year is nineteen seventy-nine, and Star Wars, released in nineteen seventy-seven, has proven that science fiction is commercially and critically viable. Studios are scrambling to replicate it. That’s why Bond goes to space. But there’s a much better script that’s been floating around for a while. And it’s the only one that 20th Century Fox has. Have you ever heard of a little movie called Alien?

Probably. With the advent of the slasher movie, spearheaded by Halloween the previous year, the next big slasher villain, picking off victims one by one, was an actual extraterrestrial life form. And I don’t want to exaggerate, but this movie is the greatest film ever constructed. I’m kidding. Second greatest. The way the tension builds, the realistic dialogue, which ties into the application of realism to the fairy tale of space, it’s all just perfect. The pacing is top notch, gold star, whatever you want to say. Audiences had never seen anything like it. And, just like every great solo movie that has a relatively open-ended ending, there was a sequel made. And another, and on and on. This is a film that spawned a franchise. This is a film that captivated its viewers by never letting go of the button that makes you sit at the edge of your seat and experience shivers. While watching this movie, I got up to go to the bathroom, a little slap noise happened behind me, and I screamed without hesitation. It makes you feel unsafe. In the best kind of way.

But perhaps the longest-lasting movie that didn’t spawn any sequels is Apocalypse Now. Inspired by Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness, an 1899 novella, Francis Ford Coppola’s story of corruption, war, and human nature went through so much trouble to be released, including the director having to leverage his car, house, and the profits from The Godfather in order to get more money from United Artists, but it was worth it. It made $150 million worldwide and was received with overwhelming praise from critics at the time. This movie’s legacy shoots it up there with movies like Citizen Kane or The Godfather (which was directed by the same guy; really has a knack for making masterpieces, doesn’t he?)

Oh wait I didn’t even talk about The Muppet Mov-