A Year in Film: 1982

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>> This morning, I found a rat. His name is SixtyFive. I like that number. The wastes are still irradiated, but Solstice is soon, and I should be able to Scavenge if I’m quick about it.

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>> Solstice came early. I should itemize my haul here. Met one other Scavenger. Was careful about it, and got out quickly. With:

– Bread (5)
– 13 Copies of the David Hasselhoff 2008 Calendar [worthless, we don’t use Gregorian]
– Two dice that only roll sixes
– A broken radiator [probably going to fix it, it gets cold in the Hovel]
– Ray-Bans [useless, it’s cloudy all the time, but they look neat]
– A sphere of metal

Metal sphere is by far the most interesting. If I want to open it, I should probably be smart about it.

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>> Radiator easy to fix. SixtyFive spends all hours by the new source of heat. My walls are adorned with Hasselhoff. I don’t know who he is. He looks neat. Metal sphere progress is negligible.

– Searched for a button for two hours
– Slammed it into the ground once and only once [nothing happened]
– Put it next to the radiator
– Rolled it into the wall
– Screamed at it for a while

I sat in a corner for a while after screaming at the sphere. No new ideas came out of that. SixtyFive really likes the radiator.

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>> Sphere opened. I don’t quite know why. Inside was simply a canvas bag full of tapes. Vhs. That’s an unpronounceable name. Vhs. These tapes are labeled, in order:

– ET
– Poltergeist
– First Blood
– Tootsie

I have a Vhs player somewhere. It might take me awhile to find it, though. I’ll write more when I’ve found it. For now, farewell, empty space and the nobody who will read this.

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>> Got the Vhs player working. Popped in ET Extraterrestrial. Cried. Didn’t know that this was going to be emotional. A story played out in front of me. I knew none of the people involved in it. No calendars of them in the wasteland. But the little brown big-eyed alien is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Besides SixtyFive, of course. SixtyFive spent the whole time by the radiator.

The music was good too. No blood or violence but tears were streaming down my face at the end.

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>> I watched the Vhs labeled Poltergeist. The Spielberg fella was involved with the production. His name was on the box. This one skeezed me out. Ew didn’t like the bones. Or the little girl. Or the TV. Nope nope nope nope nope. Scary.

That’s the point, apparently. Because the whole thing was like that. Constant ‘ew’ and ‘AAA.’ And if that was the point, they were very smart about it. Gross but I see the how and why. Not gonna watch again. SixtyFive hid under the radiator for this one.

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>> First Blood. There was a war. It ended. And now John Rambo is mad. People were mean to him when he came back. Now he’s angry. This was an interesting Vhs. The Rambo Man was sad and kinda indestructible.

He fell really far onto rocks. And didn’t die. He is big and muscled though, so perhaps that absorbed some of the impact.

Good action, interesting punchy and shooty.

Liked it. Was loud. SixtyFive hid under the radiator.

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>> Watched Tootsie. Woman who is actually a man dressed as a woman. Creepy. Just a little bit. But strangely heartwarming. He explores how to be a better person through deceiving the people around him. Like a bad person. It’s a confusing metaphor and a strange lesson.

Do all struggling and mean actors need to dress in drag and pretend to be a woman to become a better person? Is that what we should take away from this? But, the Dustin Hoffman who played the Tootsie character was good.

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>> I’ll go back into the wasteland later. I need to watch ET and cry again. SixtyFive is existing well.